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Sexuality is a gift. I truly believe that it is the way that adults let off
steam, which is why they call them "adult toys," no? I mean, it's not like
we can bust out our legos and relieve the adult stresses and pressures of
the day, right?
If you are feeling anything other than GREAT about sex or your sexuality, I
want you to stop, right now, and take a nice deep breath. Your sex and
your sexuality, your fetishes, your kinks and your quirks, are your
greatest gift! I don't care what your Mama, your Daddy, your priest, your
rabbi, your lover, the movies or your best friend has told you. Your
sexuality is unique unto you and it is yours. So please, DO NOT, I repeat,
DO NOT let anyone, ever make you feel bad about how you show up sexually in
your own life.
I am not going to tell you that I have experience in any healing
modalities, I wish that were true. However, I can tell you that I have
been a student of sex and sexuality my entire life. My Mom was a part-time
sex educator. So, as you can imagine, I grew up in a very sex positive and
kink positive environment. Thankfully, my very cool Mom also showed me how
to imbue my sexuality with spirituality, simply through the loving example
of how she lived her life and loved those around her, no matter who they
were or what they did. As she was fond of saying, "There's no accounting
for taste!" And I believe that to be true across the board, but in
particular, with regard to one's sexual expression.
On the flip side of that coin, my grandpa was Preacher. So you can imagine
how I got a double whammy growing up! I had to reconcile the "sex is good"
message from my Mom, and the "sex is BAD," message from religion. I know
first-hand how wounding those archaic teachings and beliefs can be on a
person. You see, I knew I was bisexual from a very young age and had to
endure all kinds of hell fire and brimstone messages about how evil I was
for being sexual, let alone bisexual. It's hard being a kinky, horny
person who loves a good gender fuck, in a straight-laced, bible-based (or
any other so-called holy book) world. I understand.
Sometimes, the most healing thing in the world is to just be able to talk,
openly and honestly with someone who really cares. I would be honored to
be that person for you. I have spoken to literally thousands of people
about sex and sexuality. In fact, human sexuality was one of my minors in
school. I really love being a kind, gentle, understanding presence in your
life. I am just about the most open-minded, non-judgmental person you will
ever meet. You can come to me, with anything.
Also, I have a partner who is transgendered, and, two of the people in my
immediate family are as well. As such, I have done a tremendous amount of
study on transgenderism and gender dysphoria. Exploring and playing with
gender really is the last frontier. If you feel the need to express,
either your feminine side, or your submissive side, I would love to speak
Believe it or not, when I was 9 or 10 I asked my Mom what a fetish was and
she answered me with an honest answer. (She was a sex educator, after all!)
Ever since then, I have been drawn to, what some would call the "dark" side.
I actually had my first BDSM experience in high school! I think if all of
the kinky people were to turn plaid overnight, we would be shocked at how
many of us there are. Yet, so many of us are shameful of our kinks.
I know it's hard carrying the burden of a secret shame. As the saying
goes, physician heal thyself. I have my own struggles and I have come to
know, from my own experience, that our shadow side, the one we keep hidden
from everyone else, can be our greatest teacher. Let's explore your shadow
side and see what treasure is hidden there. As Joseph Campbell said, "The
cave you fear to enter holds the treasure that you seek." Let's find your